John Keats’ Fear of Forgetting

John Keats, “[When I have fears that I may cease to be]”

When I have fears that I may cease to be
Before my pen has gleaned my teeming brain,
Before high-pilèd books, in charactery,
Hold like rich garners the full ripened grain;
When I behold, upon the night’s starred face,
Huge cloudy symbols of a high romance,
And think that I may never live to trace
Their shadows with the magic hand of chance;
And when I feel, fair creature of an hour, 5
That I shall never look upon thee more,
Never have relish in the faery power
Of unreflecting love—then on the shore
Of the wide world I stand alone, and think
Till love and fame to nothingness do sink. 10

John Keats’ task is to gather and disseminate the big ideas in his brain into a coherent work of high romance and win the woman he loves, but it is risky and he fears that his ideas will be lost before he can accomplish this as they are overwhelming him. Keats has a “teeming brain”, and it is sprouting his ideas for poetry, metaphorized as the “grain” in line 4. But his brain is also crowded by them, and they are scrambled and not gathered yet. Keats is afraid that he could lose his memory of them, or, in other words, that the grain could rot. This is “before the pen has gleaned his ideas”. It is the only thing that can collect and sort the “ripened grain” and hold it like “rich garners”, which is another metaphor for his pen writing down his ideas and thus preserving them. But Keats cannot know the future. There is a chance, or probability, for him to be able to succeed, and he wishes for “the magic hand of chance”, which is the opportunity to “trace the shadows” of the “huge cloudy symbols of a high romance”, that is, solve the puzzle. The “cloudiness” and “shadows” of the symbols portray the uncertainty of capturing them. Keats can still see his ideas in the “shadow”, but they are faint imitations. By tracing the image, he is revealing and completing it. He is also lighting it up. But Keats fears that he will never have this opportunity. Considering that “chance” also defines a number expressing a ratio, Keats is losing time.

His goal is to win the love of what he calls a “fair creature”, his female lover who is also meant to be a judge to him, giving him a just chance to complete his task. This combination of beauty and justice can be imagined as the Roman goddess Justitia. Keats is trying to write to impress his love, similar to a hero in the “high romance” genre that he is writing about. It is likely that his love for her along with the genre is inspiring him. But she is only “of an hour”, having a limited time with Keats, so he fears that it will not be enough for him, as he may “cease to be” or fail in his task, also similar to a high romance hero. From her, Keats will taste “the faery power of unreflecting love”. It is an enchanted power, which is so great it is difficult for him to imagine having it, almost as he will never have it. It is like an “illusion” as he has probably not yet formed a proper relationship with the woman he is seeking. This is one of the major desires he has. Part of the love’s power is that it is “unreflecting”, meaning he does not have to work or “reflect” on it as it is sensual or natural. Another reason the love is enchanted is because its relaxation is so far off from a man who is working so hard he is “teeming”. Keats has a difficult task ahead of him: to find the pieces of his scrambled ideas and finish the puzzle, thus earning his girl’s love, and he fears failure. This is what many writers face: they may have strong imaginations but have trouble remembering their ideas and/or expressing them coherently, and fear can also make it difficult for them to concentrate.